It’s been almost a week since the awful discussion with my professor. The major side-effects of such philosophical discussion are the down-time in machinery of my mind. And the people affected by it were few souls half way around the world.
My reclusive behavior wasn’t a shocker for anyone as people believe that we are kind souls. We all forgive on admittance of repentance and the same was done by me. But sometimes one gets angry to an extent that the mind itself begins to discard the necessities for existence, especially when the culprit is one self. This time I guess it went too much and which I believe will extent for another year. This embargo of communication with every soul is meant for the benefit of everyone and to explain it to anyone is difficult and yet I hope they understand.
So, I was on bed and it was 10 in morning (Yes… I do get to sleep late in morning, envy me!) and I received a call from very distant number. First I thought, let it be, I won’t be picking up the call. On the second thought, my etiquettes didn’t allow me to be so rude. It was one of the lovely soul, that was famously known as the most hilarious brother in the batch and to my gladness he is my friend. The sad part was that I had to explain the reason for such absurd reclusive behavior which for a freak like me was very difficult. Yet he understood my problem and assured his presence.
“Assuring one’s presence” is a thing that we all have been doing at different time. It started with me calling and pestering everyone after we all went our own ways. But in case of a distress, broken communication chain or tragedy, it was my duty to make sure that he/she is remembered by everyone and he/she knows that they are not alone.
This tool was being used for me and I was happy in a certain way but disappointed from myself for letting this happen. But a sneak like me never loses their sight no matter where they are or what they might be doing. It’s just that in this world then noise is all that you hear, sometimes it feels good to escape from the world to solitude. It’s an amazing experience.
It’s better to protect beloved from distance than troubling them from your presence. It’s just like that.